Phan- Hate what makes me
by Fandementors
Summary: Phil's POV, urm... Includes an OC, but not a huge one... AND IT'S PHAN! YAY! *Free prize if you read it!* YAY! (I will update every week... hopefully...) SassyNorbert
1. Chapter 1

**SO HEY! PHAN STORY YEEEYYYYYYYY! **

**okay so. I wrote this a while ago, but didn't have an account, but now I have one, so now I throw this Multi-chapter phan story *Throws story* And if you read, you get a prize! YAYYY ~SassyNorbert**

I heard Dan's light laughter echo from the living room, closely followed by a small female giggle. I couldn't help but smile through my tears. They really were perfect together, even I couldn't put my own selfish feelings before that. 'Phil?...' I heard Dan's voice call, but I didn't reply. there was some whispering, and a shuffling sound, before a soft knock on my bedroom door. I slowly got up, wincing from my throbbing headache, and peeked round the door. it was Tanya, Dan's girlfriend.

Tanya was a lovely girl, and she looked a lot like Dan. Her chocolate hair, naturally straight unlike Dan's, framed her perfectly shaped face, and her lips, usually formed into a perfect smile, now turned down into a concerned frown, and her eyes, A perfectly polished mocha. Exactly like Dans. Even someone as gay as me couldn't deny how beautiful she was. 'Oh Phil...' she whispered, then took me into a tight embrace. She was the only person who knew about it. About how I was utterly hopelessly in love with her boyfriend. My best friend. _I'm sorry._ She didn't mind though.

She could tell I had been crying, and she could tell instantly what I had been thinking. She dragged me over to my bed, sat me down, shut my door, then sat with me. She looked right through my eyes with her coffee coloured ones, so much like Dan's. "Don't you dare, Phil." she whispered. Her lip trembled. I let out a quavering sigh. She could see right through me. that's why I liked her to be the one with Dan. she always knew how to make him happy, like I never could.

'Phil, please. Don't you dare even think about it. Not for one second! Please?' She pleaded. I'd never heard her voice so worried, Well, apart from that time...'Phil please listen! You can't! not now, not ever. Never again. Just think about-'

'Tanya stop.' I interrupted, my voice catching from my tears. 'I know. I-I won't.' I lied. I just had to get them out of the house. She hesitated, as though not sure If I was being truthful, but then decided I could be trusted.

She closed her eyes for a second, took a deep breath, then came back to reality. 'Okay. Well me and Dan are heading out for a bit so... Oh stay strong, Phil. For me and Dan, okay?' She gave me a huge hug, wiped away my tears, then left. I sat, frozen, and heard the front door open then click shut, and listened to the laughter of the pair fade into nothingness. I then slowly stood, letting a few more tears fall, Picked up my notepad, and began to write...

** Well. Haha so yeah. I will try and update at least once every other week, but I'm aiming for once a week... Hope you enjoyed this chapter! AND DON'T BE SAD! YOUR PRISE FOR READING CHAPTER ONE IS One free invisible sock full of Nutella! YAY!**

**~SassyNorbert**

**OH! I forgot… Please Favorite, follow and review, my little gingers! (I call everyone ginger, okay, SO DON'T JUDGE ME!)**


	2. Chapter 2,

_**Oh dear... sorry I didn't upload for like three thousand years guys, I had exams and... yeah, I'm not going to even bother making excuses, I was procrastinating. So there. ANYWAY I will beg for your forgiveness at the end of the chapter.**_

**(the next chapters will each start with a line of what Phil is writing, and then will go back in Phil's memory to the event mentioned.) **

_"Dear Dan,_

_the very first thing you need to know is that this is NOT your fault. none of it. but I want you to remember all the things that are etched in my memory, like how we first met, via the internet..."_

"PHIL!"

"coming mum" I moaned, as I switched off the camera which I had been using to film a new video, but I was rudely interrupted by my dinner being made. After dinner, however, I couldn't be bothered to continue filming, and It wasn't turning out very well anyway. I decided to look through some comments on my videos. as I was scrolling, one person in particular kept jumping out, saying things such as "This is THE funniest thing I have seen in AGESSSS!" Or "OMG haha! This is hilarious. Literally." then one, saying "Hey I know you won't, but check out my videos maybe? No? eh ok" so I clicked on his channel name, 'Danisnotonfire' and chose a video named "Butter fingers" and all I could think was, "This guy's hilarious!"

I logged onto my twitter (after watching all of this Dan guy's videos and laughing nonstop for about five HUNDRED hours) and typed his YouTube name into the search bar, and what do you know, his profile popped up. I checked out his twitter, and decided to send him a little tweet.

" Danisnotonfire: Hey! So I checked out your videos, and you are a comical genius!"

I smiled to myself, and even though I wasn't expecting a reply, almost immediately

" amazingphil: OMG Really? But you're amazingphil... like THE amazingphil... omg."

I giggled to myself at the fact that Dan was practically fangirling. I typed a reply.

" Danisnotonfire: Yeah! Best videos on YouTube, I think ;)"

We tweeted back and forth for a few hours and discovered that we are almost the same person, we share the same favourite band, same favourite album, and we are both youtubers and a ton of other stuff. needless to say, I fangirled more than healthy.

After a few days of tweeting back and forth, I got a tweet from Dan asking if I wanted to Skype, and I told him that my Skype name is the same, Amazingphil.

_**Okay so I know it's a short chapter, and I am sosososososo SORRY for not uploading in like, thousands of years, but I promise I will upload at least every other week from now on, so please Favourite and review, it means a lot, and feel free to get your friends to read as well. AND YOUR PRIZE Today ISSSS A lifetime's supply of out of date skittles c: ~SassyNorbert**_


	3. Chapter 3

**_OMG actually updating on time yay! XD_**

_"...And the first time we skyped, how we used to stay up all night just talking about silly things..."_

"Phil, Giraffes don't make noises!" I heard him laugh from within my laptop screen. We had been skyping since 5 in the evening, and it was now 1am. "They do! Honestly, I... I've heard one!" I giggled

"Really?" he said, mock sternly.

"Yeah... no" I laughed. We had only known each other for a few weeks but already we were acting as if we'd known each other all our lives. He looked better over Skype than he did in person, and I still couldn't believe he wanted to talk to me! "Uh Phil? Earth to space lion... Are you there?" I snapped back to reality as I heard Dan calling and saw him waving his arms about, until his arm hit something and it fell to the floor and smashed "Ah Fuck!" he yelled then immediately clapped his hand over his mouth. His mum then thundered across into Dan's room, yelled at him then left. I tried hard to contain my laughter but as soon as his mum left I burst into fits of giggles, "Hey it's not funny!" Dan said, but I could see he was suppressing his laughter, and we were soon both clutching our sides gasping for air. Before we knew what had happened, it was two thirty. "Oh my god, I should go" Dan said when we had recovered from our giggle attack. "Why?" I frowned.

"I uh... I sort of got a job" Dan mumbled

"What!?" I said astounded. Dan? A job?

"Yeah at some shitty DIY store." This made me laugh a lot.

"Dan got a job!" I chanted, childishly.

"Shush." He sulked. I sniggered then said

"Well I should go then, don't want to be _late, _do you" I joked.

"Hmph. Well goodnight little lion boy"

"Goodnight little llama."

We both made cheesy heart signals to the camera then I shut my laptop, plummeting my room into sudden darkness. I got into bed and lied there, staring at my ceiling. Dan was just my friend, right? He didn't think of it any more than that, and nor should I. But I did. I Thought of Dan as more than a friend even though it was clear that's not what he wanted. My little llama.

**Okay so this one is pretty short, and I'm sorry, but at least I uploaded it on time ^.^ I'm not sure if I will be able to upload next Sunday, because I still haven't. written it yet, and school, and ugh. But yeah, please review, follow and favourite, and don't be afraid to share this, or even PM me. Your prize today isssssss... strawberry scented shampoo :3 ~SassyNorbert**


	4. Chapter 4

**HEY GUYS LOOK, UPDATE! okay so I know I haven't updated in a while, and I'm sorry, but Exams and ugh... so here is chapter four, enjoy!**

_"I remember how when we first met, I thought you wouldn't come..."_

I woke up early ish to the sound of my phone going off, and leapt out of bed to answer. I smiled when I saw it was from Dan.

**llama boy**

**11:45am**

**mooooooooooooooooorning! can't wait to FINALLY meet you today!**

So I quickly send one back reading:

**aah same! Well see you at 1! :P**

wait, one?! It'll take me an hour to get to the train station... I had fifteen minuets!I grabbed my clothes, stripped, and ran to the shower. (Good thing my parents were on holiday!) Somehow I managed to shower, dress and sort out my hair before 12, and I started my long walk to the train station.

...

Where was he?! Dan was meant to meet me an hour ago, but I hadn't even received a text to explain . I let out a sigh, stood up and started to walk away solemnly When I heard a shout. I Turned around to see a brown hair, brown-eyed beauty jogging (somewhat slowly) towards me. he then stopped halfway to breath (and cough up his lungs apparently) so I walked over to where he stopped and gave him a hug. "Dan! I thought you weren't going to come!" I whined.

"Woke... late... bus... stupid... train... here" He said between breaths, his hand on his chest, leaning over dramatically, making me laugh.

"Oh it's okay, you're here now" I giggled, hugging him again. we then walked back to my house with Dan moaning the entire way about how far it was.

When we got to mine and had a cup of tea (how British, eh?) the awkward nervousness set in.

"so... this is my house..." I mentally kicked myself, well done captain obvious.

"cool..." Dan said awkwardly.

"...um... so do you... wanna play sonic?"

"DO I?!"

And so that sorted out the awkwardness. we talked for hours about Pokemon and other little fanboyish things, and before we knew it, it was three in the morning! "Oh my god, It's really late!" dan exclaimed.

"Oh wow, yeah!" I replied "we should get some sleep. so how about we... I dunno, make a video or something tomorrow?" I asked, somehow nervously.

"Awh yeah, cool!"

so we planned the video, and slept, letting me dream dreams full of the man sleeping on my floor who definitely didn't feel the same.

**okay well it's a sort of short chapter, and I know it's not the best, but I hope you enjoy, please review, favorite and follow guys, and your prize today issssssssssssssssss Jake the magical dog! love ya guys :P ~SassyNorbert**


	5. Chapter 5

_"But when I edited the video I noticed how obvious my feelings really were, even if I hadn't realised them myself..."_

I pulled the headphones from my ears and took a break from editing the video me and dan made. He left only three hours ago, yet I already missed him, so I Pulled out my phone and sent him a text.

**To: llama boy**

**Yo i'm just taking a break from editing the video, wanna skype?**

And almost instantaneously, I got a reply.

**Llama boy**

**14:25**

**Ugh sorry, I can't, shopping with mum: /**

Well so much for that. So I put my headphones back in and smiled at the frame i had left. It was the part where I bowled dan over at the end. Huh. When you watch it over again it almost looks like we're a couple... "No. Stop thinking like that, phil." I told myself. Dan is just my friend, and he _definitely_ doesn't feel anything towards me. Dan's straight. I know that.

After I had finished editing the video, which I ingeniously named "Philisnotonfire" I uploaded it onto you tube, and sent Dan a link.

I must have watched that video over and over again, and each time I noticed something different. The way dan's eyes sparkle, the way he looks down when he laughs, the way I always glance at him for slightly too long, or how my face lights up when I look his way. But I didn't like dan more than a friend, I wasn't gay. Was I? I don't remember falling asleep that night, but when I woke up, I remembered dreams filled with the sweet chocolate of his eyes and the soft feel of his chesnut hair.

I realized then that maybe, just maybe, Daniel Howell would be the one ocupating my mind for a long time to come.

**Okaiiiii hai guys, so I know it's short, but I'm sorry, I've had tons of mix-ups with my GCSEs and ugh... but anyway, tis here now, so enjoy your free *insert prise here* and I will upload the next chapter when I get chance to. Sorry this is shitty, but eh... ~SassyNorbert**


End file.
